A Minimalist Approach to Washing the Dishes

kitchensinkBefore I work on an important project with a person, I like to get a good look at their kitchen sink. This is sometimes difficult to accomplish, but it is worth the extra effort. I’ll try to get myself invited over to their house, if that fails I’ll try peering into their kitchen window.

Why do I do this? Because a person’s kitchen sink is a fundamental judge of their character.

A person can disguise many of their inadequacies. They can fake it until they make it with reputation, showmanship, and publicity.

But, it’s really hard to fake the fact that you can’t do your dishes.

Those dishes are right there in the sink and they are dirty.

I know this because I’ve lived with a lot of people in the past. At one point I was living with ten people in Brooklyn, in a huge old school house that was awesome. These roommates would come and go, and so over the 2.5 years I probably lived with 35-40 people. I realize this sounds crazy, but it was a big house, and these were some of the most remarkable people that I’ve ever known.

That being said, some of them didn’t know how to do dishes, so I observed them.

Based on simple observation, and the fact that I used the kitchen at least twice a day, it was easy to cross-reference dish washing ability with other personality traits.

[Update]Please note, I’m being a little silly here. Don’t take me too seriously. I do believe doing the dishes is beneficial, but I got a little carried away in how I explained things. Please forgive the slightly humor that attempted poorly to employ.

People who do their dishes immediately after eating are:

  • Generally happier
  • Accomplish more with their lives
  • Are less overwhelmed by life
  • Make more money

People who don’t do their dishes are:

  • Constantly struggling to keep up
  • Have trouble dealing with clutter in their lives
  • Have panic attacks more often
  • Are sometimes depressed

This is by no means a scientific study, but I believe the findings could be proven scientifically if a scientist were to study them.

You might be thinking that this blog post doesn’t apply to you, because you live alone and have a dishwasher. However, I’ve had experience living with people who have dishwashers, and you can simply change the heading above to ‘People who don’t put their dishes in the dishwasher are:’ and you get the same results.

Actually, if you do own a dishwasher, I’d like you to consider not using it for awhile.

Learning to wash dishes can have a profound effect on your approach to a minimalist life. If you adopt the habit of taking personal responsibility for the mess you create after every meal, this important habit will carry over in to other aspects of your life.

The reason that dish washing has such a profound effect on character.

Doing dishes is a basic habit that crosses into many other areas of your life. Chances are, if you can’t do dishes, you also can’t clean out your closet, or you can’t say no to buying a third car.

This is why the first step of trying to become a minimalist is to start with the kitchen sink.

This is a practical way to create a habit that will benefit you for the rest of your life, and all it involves is the simple choice to do your dishes immediately after every meal. If that seems like an impossible task, try doing your dishes before you go to bed. That being said, I’d like you to gradually work up the ability to clean your dishes within fifteen minutes of eating.

How to do dishes to create a more focused minimalist life.

  1. Make the decision now to start doing your dishes after every meal. This is the most important step, don’t let yourself off the hook. Take the time to do the dishes now, and you won’t have to do them later.
  2. Take pride in doing other people’s dishes. When you live with other people, take pride in doing the dishes for them. Some people insist on spending hours if their lives arguing over who is going to do the dishes, but this is counter-productive. The best way to encourage a person you live with to do their dishes is to take initiative and do all of the dishes in the sink. Eventually they will recognize the burden they’ve put on you and begin to do their own dishes. This will make your shared living space much more enjoyable.
  3. Put away all of your dishes. Now that all of your dishes are clean, dry them and put them away. This way your counter top is completely uncluttered.
  4. Have less dishes. You may find that you have too many dishes. Some people have 25 coffee mugs in their cupboard, why do you have 25 coffee cups? You can clean the cup you used for coffee in the morning and use it again. You only need one cup per person, plus as many as you might have guests for tea. I find that three coffee cups is more than enough for a person who lives alone, four if you live with one person. If you throw a dinner party tell your friends to bring a mug, or invest in recyclable plastic or paper cups for the occasion.

Eventually you the habit of dish washing will become a habit that you do regularly and with great appreciation. Your kitchen sink will never be full of disgusting dishes. At this point congratulate yourself, you’re awesome!

You’ll be surprised, doing the dishes regularly will effect many other aspects of your life. The part of your mind that is always worrying that you have to clean the dishes when you get home will be silent. You’ve entered a brand new world full of clean dishes and an uncluttered kitchen.

“To my mind, the idea that doing dishes is unpleasant can occur only when you aren’t doing them. Once you are standing in front of the sink with your sleeves rolled up and your hands in the warm water, it is really quite pleasant. I enjoy taking my time with each dish, being fully aware of the dish, the water, and each movement of my hands. I know that if I hurry in order to eat dessert sooner, the time of washing dishes will be unpleasant and not worth living. That would be a pity, for each minute, each second of life is a miracle. The dishes themselves and that fact that I am here washing them are miracles!” -Thich Nhat Hanh

If you enjoyed this story, please share it with anyone you know who could use some improvement in the dish-cleaning department. You know who I’m talking about.

If you’re new to my blog, and you enjoy reading about the topic of being more minimalist in your life, please consider signing up to receive free updates via rss or email.

  • Thanks so much for the comments everyone. I'm so thankful for the support and I'm glad you enjoyed the post.
  • "Fueled by condescension"? really? I don't think so. This was a well-thought out post. I like the psychological side you bring up. I really don't like doing my dishes but I also like a clean kitchen. I love getting up early in the morning and having everything clean while I fix my coffee and sit for awhile in the dark. Once I'm into it, it's not so bad, it's just a matter of getting a little bit motivated and getting started. Also I don't use my dishwasher. Since I live alone it's easier and less consuming to just do the few dishes by hand. I do however let them air dry and put them away in the morning. In fact here's a quote from webMD - "At home, it's always better to air dry your dishes than to use a dish towel, because a dish towel can harbor all sorts of bacteria. You wipe your hands with it, you use it to dry the counter, and then you use it to dry the dishes!"
    Mercer agrees. "Air-drying is best. Or, if you do want to hand-dry your dishes at home, use a clean cloth, fresh from the drawer."

    The whole articles is here - http://www.webmd.com/news/20010817/air-dry-your...

    .
  • oooooh no!,
    my grammar sucks,
    my English sucks,
    "I find poor grammar and punctuation distracting."
    ->
    I feel stupid because English is NOT my mother tongue -
    isn't the content, message, more important than 'poor grammar'? Interaction is more important than pure grammar. Or did I miss something?
  • I have not used a dishwasher in 2 years. Even after a dinner party, I sponge the dirty dishes within 2 hours of usage and wash them together.

    You can always recycle the grey water if you use organic dish washing detergent.
  • Carol, I'm so glad you brought up the subject of water, because I didn't mention it at all. I'm a big fan of using as little water as possible when washing the dishes.

    My dish routine usually involves hand soaping dishes with a wet sponge. This involves no running continuously running water. Then you do a quick rinse of one dish after another with a half-on faucet. This can be done with any number of dishes and uses the least amount of water, because I'm not filling a sink with suds or anything like that.

    I think this is the best way, but I'm open to ideas.

    Does anyone else have good limited-water dish washing strategies?
  • Carol
    I don't disagree with your arguments, but you haven't mentioned the amount of water used. Waiting until there are enough dishes to fill the sink uses less water than washing a few at a time. It's a small thing, but if one is trying to conserve in all areas, the small things count.
  • Philipp
    Funny, I just thought about that a couple of days ago. I was thinking of my brothers roommate. And how we had to take care of the mess in the kitchen while moving.

    Since then I try to put everything in the dishwasher right away.

    I'm not alone, thanks Everett! :)
  • I inherited a lot of dishes, bowls and mugs when my roommate got hitched. I now live alone with about ten or more dishes, bowls, glasses and coffee mugs. Since they are free, I didnt dispose of them. I keep most of them hidden in the most unreachable corner of my pantry closet. I only keep two dinner plates, four bowls (I use some for mixing and food preparation), two coffee mugs and two glasses out. This way, after every meal, I am forced to wash the dishes.

    I bring more dinnerware out when I have guests but they go right back to the pantry closet.
  • Wow, I'm fairly new here, and this is really insightful! I've had different "dish doing" issues in the past, and what you've said really makes sense. One thing that really stood out for me is the arguments people have over dish doing, when this is really about personal responsibility. If I have the discipline to do my own dishes then that discipline probably spills over to other areas of my life (like resisting that 3rd car, as you mention). If I'm looking to blame others for the dishes, and not take responsibility for them, that too, probably manifests in other areas of life, not related to dish doing.

    Also, I've noticed that the cleaner my sink, the more likely my closet, finances, and other areas of my life are in order. Great post!

    Cheers,
    Miche :)
  • Yeah, who would have known a post on dish washing would be so politically polarizing? Though, I suppose this is a war that roommates have been waging longer than there was trouble in the middle east.

    I have to concede though, it's always easier to come to a consensus on an issue when you aren't trying to be funny. I could have written this post from a more constructive angle.
  • Wow, flamed for a post about dishwashing...who'd have thunk it possible.

    I for one enjoyed it thoroughly, not in small part because one of my roommates is incapable of putting away his dishes. He washes them...but then they stay in the drying rack...indefinitely.

    ggrrrrr
  • Very interesting post, In fact I once were from the "I-hate-to-do-the-dishes" group, but with time and a little bit of consciousness I find myself doing the dishes every time I use one.

    I may have not noticed that this simple activity would make me happier, but yeah you are right it might have been a good start.
  • My intention is only to be a little funny Suzy. I apologize if you took this post personally.
  • You're right, your observations are by no means scientific and entirely based on assumptions.with no theoretical framework (either psychological, anthropological or sociological) to guide your 'analysis' which is in fact subjective opinion fuelled by condescension.

    I'm hoping that this article is a satirical tongue-in-cheek attempt to laugh at dishwashing...but i'm not so sure it is.
  • shawnacevraini
    Excellent point Everett! This is the point that the FlyLady always makes as well - to start with the kitchen sink to get control of your clutter - in the house, and in your life! I actually have a post it note beside my sink saying "Shine the sink!"
    This is a friendly reminder to me, and most days, I do this before heading to work and at the end of the day. Having a clean sink in the morning just seems to make the day go better!
    Thanks for reiterating that!
  • Greg. Yeah, do those dishes. Thanks for reading and retweeting!

    Thanks for pointing out the error Danielle, I think I've fixed it. You reminded me that one unwashed dirty spoon in a sink is still a dirty dish. I'm trying to get better at copy editing, but I have to try harder.
  • danielle
    I find poor grammar and punctuation distracting. I tend to judge people by their willingness or reluctance to find someone to proofread their work before publishing. Please have a more critical look at your blog entry.

    I feel the same way about kitchen sinks in general, but I will say that I have recently cleaned house for someone who never had dirty dishes in the sink, but who otherwise behaved like someone who had an entire kitchen strewn with dirty dishes. The theory doesn't always extrapolate, and this is but one example.

    Your blog post certainly was inspiring, though. If I leave for work this morning without washing all the dishes I will fee terrible all day, all the more so because my job is pretty awful. (Thank goodness I took a few minutes out of my morning to meditate.)
  • Hey Everett,
    I really like the quote you included, man I hate doing dishes! but now I kinda feel that i need to lose the hate.
    Cheers
    Greg
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